come the fuck on

[hemomancer]

It's a bright New England winter day. Xan and Leo have elected to take the tunnels from Poe dorm to the Powers Theory classroom, because regardless of their Exemplar ratings, they're still from California and it's eight degrees out. And the tunnels have central heating. Glorious, glorious central heating.

In the middle of an extended diatribe against artificial turf, Xan opens the door to Schuester Hall, which is... not the door to Schuester Hall.

Xan peers at it. "Are we being pranked or something? Has someone not been informed that I piss napalm?"

"You bleed napalm," notes Leo. "If you were pissing it we'd have a medical issue on our hands. Somebody could've thrown up an illusion, but I don't really see the point of replacing Schuester with... a bar? With some chick inside? Like, what, we're going to whip out our fake IDs and get in trouble? But Mom always says that if you can't see the point of a trap then whoever set it is smarter than you are. Let's go down the hall and take the south door."

"Jesus Christ," Xan mutters, hauling Leo in by the arm. "Let's avoid the cool-as-shit magic bar, he says. You're such a fucking girl."

Leo makes a noise of protest. "I'm working on that! And I object to your manhandling!"

"Shut up."

"Okay."

They behold the bar. It's a very nice bar. It has a window to some exploding stars. "Huh. I'm... pretty sure that's magic of some kind," notes Leo.

"So am I, dipshit, we're both wizards."

"Just making conversation."

Comments

[stonedtimewitch]

Damara picks the pinkest looking soap she can find. If she is going to be a misanthropic bitch she may as well do so while smelling of spring flowers. "Hey birdy, help me with my hair," she says after she is done, trying to remake her prefered bun.

[andaisq]

The birdy continues to decline to respond! In fact, it appears not to be moving at all. How odd.

[stonedtimewitch]

Damara realizes what is happening and sighs. She kicks aside the partition and looks at the hologram. She can't figure out where its coming from but it gives her ideas. Someone was messing with her and she would repay them 12 times over.

[andaisq]

In the meantime, several high-pressure jets of ice water slam into her face with teeth-jarring force, and a filament springs out of the wall to give her a shock that could be described as "the joy buzzer from Hell".

[stonedtimewitch]

Damara reacts to this prank with unsettling laughter, even as the the jet of water knocks her to the ground and electricity courses through her body. 12 times over would apparently not be enough. "[Enjoying my hard nipples?]" She asks to the room on the off chance the prankster is listening. She gets to her feet and walks to her clothes, there is a wide smile on her face.

[andaisq]

Sky walks through the door, holding a towel. It regards Damara with wary disinterest.

"Oh, it's you. Apparently we're going to d- why's there a hologram of me in there?"

[stonedtimewitch]

"Someone wanted to get off to your image while showering?" she suggests with a shrug. She didn't actually think the trap was from Sky, it didn't seem to fit their character. She reaches for Sky's towel to dry off her face with, she'll let her clothes absorb up the rest of the water.

"Anyone here you know that likes playing with tech like that, Birdy?" she asks, trying to sound more cordial then usual.

[andaisq]

Sky tolerates the towel theft with admirable grace. (If Xan's going to be picking up strays, it might as well make an effort to get along.)

"I mean, there's some gadgeteers and devisors and all that around. The hologram narrows it down a bit... did it do anything, or just sit there?"

[stonedtimewitch]

Damara hands the towel back to Sky and puts her clothes back on, she decides Sky doesn't need to know what just happened to her. Not only was it embarrassing for her to be caught out like that, she also doubts Sky would be willing to be complicit in her revenge. "I just want to know who makes shit like that, my room is bare right now and holo decorations would be nice."

[andaisq]

Sky's face lights up. "Oh! Well, if you're just looking for decorations, my boyfriend does some really nice hologram work, and he's always looking for commissions. And then there's Spark, she's an actual artist but she uses hard light displays for maximum effect, and... Do you want a list? I'd be happy to help you personalize your room, that sounds like a great way to adjust to a new world."

[stonedtimewitch]

"Sure, list would be nice," Damara says, putting up her actually sweet smile. Maybe she will actually grab some decorations off of whichever one of these people isn't responsible for hurting her. She really hopes that Sky's boyfriend wasn't the one responsible but revenge is much more important then her relationship to the apparently very nice Angel. "You are very helpful, thanks."

[andaisq]

"Well, we, uh, got off on the wrong foot, I think. But Xan and Leo like you, so I don't want to be the team albatross. You know? Nobody wants to be the only friend who doesn't get along with somebody."

[stonedtimewitch]

"I think," says the girl who isn't really sure what albatrosses have to do with anything. "Anyway can I have list, you have shower to do and I have places to go."

[andaisq]

"Oh! Sure." Sky shuffles through its bag for a piece of paper, then rapidly writes a neat series of names and room numbers on it. "This is everybody with expertise in holograms or other things that might be nice in a room. I marked the ones that live in Poe, so you can find them more easily. And I'll see you... in a bit, I guess, because apparently Xan recruited you?"

[stonedtimewitch]

"I guess," she says, grabbing the list. "Tell him he can start without me, I might be late." She knows her time was limited, most likely whoever had set the trap also had a way to watch what was happening in the shower. There was a very good chance they were already in the process of running and hiding. Damara takes a deep breath, the internal ticking in her head slowing down, a single loud tick reverberating in her mind every ten seconds. She walks out of the room, not caring that she's leaving Sky mid conversation.

The first one to go after was Sky's boyfriend, at 10x speed she is a blur as she makes her way there. She really hopes she'd find her victim quickly, the ticking is giving her a headache.

[andaisq]

The list says that Hakim Ahmad, codename Thaumaturge, with small heart dotting the i, resides on the second floor. His door is open; he's lying on his bed wearing boxers, an undershirt, and a sci-fi-looking visor thingy.

Without looking up, he waves a hand. "I don't believe we've met."

[stonedtimewitch]

Damara takes him not running away as a sign that he might not be the one she is looking for. She speeds up her internal clock so that she is now traveling through time at a rate of one second per second and smiles. "No I new, name is Damara," she says, waving at him. She steps into his room and closes the door behind her. "You know Sky? She said you good with holograms and tech."

She is doing her best not to seem actively sinister, there is an entirely good chance that she is looking at the person who will help her decorate. However she is completely on guard in case this is another trap.

[andaisq]

He sits up. "Yes indeed. Sky's my SO. You fucked up on its pronouns, but I won't hold it against you. You also sexually harassed it yesterday, which I do hold against you, but Sky's decided to play nice, so I'll let it slide. Apart from zapping you, I mean. So I guess it might be more accurate to say we're even?"

[stonedtimewitch]

She starts laughing. Oh well, she had a literal list of other people she could get her sailor moon related holo statues from. "[Did you get a video of the show?]" she asks, walking towards him. "[I know I look sexy wet and on my back.]"

She sees the visor he wears on his face and has an idea. "[If you want to be even give me those silly glasses, don't make me force them off you.]" She would give him five seconds, presumably he has a translator of some sort, even if he didn't she would make good on her threat.

[andaisq]

Hakim sighs. "I don't speak Japanese. Were you threatening me, or making weird innuendos?"

[stonedtimewitch]

"[Yes,]" she replies, although she says so while speeding up her internal time as fast as she can. The ticks extend longer, becoming louder as they cease to be ticks. At this point all Damara can hear is the gears grinding behind the clock, she grits her teeth and moves forward. She just needs to touch the visor before whatever defense system thats around it becomes active. If she can do that then she can reduce the visor to dust.

[andaisq]

As her fingers brush the visor, there's an eldritch spark. It feels like her entire body is a funny bone being hit with an enormous rubber mallet.

Energy drains out of her like water through a sieve as the glow intensifies.

[stonedtimewitch]

Damara feels the gears in her head speed up as her ability to hold them back drains out of her. She ignores the way the spinning gears chafe against her being, instead concentrating entirely on the visor. She fells her finger move through it as the material rusts and then turns to dust beneath her hand.

Time snapped on her, suddenly everything was going at the appropriate speed. She fell forward, landing on Hakim. Her head aches from the shock of the ticking forcing itself to go at full speed. Her hand is just on his face now, covered in the dust of what had been his visor. His actual face is completely untouched by her powers, as she intended.

[andaisq]

Hakim blinks.

"Cool. Love when people break my shit, it's the best. You done?"

[stonedtimewitch]

"Next time I stab you in the eye," she says, breathing deeply, she tries to push herself up and then decides that is not happening. "You have asprin or something?"