come the fuck on

[hemomancer]

It's a bright New England winter day. Xan and Leo have elected to take the tunnels from Poe dorm to the Powers Theory classroom, because regardless of their Exemplar ratings, they're still from California and it's eight degrees out. And the tunnels have central heating. Glorious, glorious central heating.

In the middle of an extended diatribe against artificial turf, Xan opens the door to Schuester Hall, which is... not the door to Schuester Hall.

Xan peers at it. "Are we being pranked or something? Has someone not been informed that I piss napalm?"

"You bleed napalm," notes Leo. "If you were pissing it we'd have a medical issue on our hands. Somebody could've thrown up an illusion, but I don't really see the point of replacing Schuester with... a bar? With some chick inside? Like, what, we're going to whip out our fake IDs and get in trouble? But Mom always says that if you can't see the point of a trap then whoever set it is smarter than you are. Let's go down the hall and take the south door."

"Jesus Christ," Xan mutters, hauling Leo in by the arm. "Let's avoid the cool-as-shit magic bar, he says. You're such a fucking girl."

Leo makes a noise of protest. "I'm working on that! And I object to your manhandling!"

"Shut up."

"Okay."

They behold the bar. It's a very nice bar. It has a window to some exploding stars. "Huh. I'm... pretty sure that's magic of some kind," notes Leo.

"So am I, dipshit, we're both wizards."

"Just making conversation."

Comments

[hemomancer]

"Oh, you sell yourself short. Fifteen minutes, tops. Maybe twenty. Maybe an hour and a half."

[callmeleo]

"Flatterer."

[stonedtimewitch]

"Okay so I know your rpg stats. [You did neglect to tell me your dick size which is the important one but oh well.]" She leans back in her seat. "I Damara, sit with me if you wish. Just no blood magic shit, this bar get angry about violence because it big spoil sport. Don't worry, I not going to turn you old." She raises a hand to signal the bar for more drinks and to apearify her prefered snacks, pastries with dangerous amounts of sugar and chocolate, onto the table.

[hemomancer]

He goes to sit down, followed by Leo. Above Leo's head appears [4 inches but working on it] in Japanese, written with floating blood; Xan stretches casually, revealing [8 and a half] written on his left hand in the same bloody script. Leo notices none of this, but looks mildly suspicious anyway. (Leo is always suspicious when Xan isn't visibly doing anything awful. It's unnatural.)

"Those RPG stats are kind of significant to our lives. And, uh, yours, given you're a mutant as well. Also, you neglected to mention your pastry creation powers."

[stonedtimewitch]

"That the bar, not me," Damara says with some resentment. She regrets nothing her powers have let her accomplish but she would honestly consider having pastry powers a fair trade. She makes a point to look at the two men's crotches as opposed to their face while talking to them. "Where I am from no one tell me my stats, they just try to get rid of my sexy head. That blood not going to explode is it? I be very made if you ruin so much good fudge." She grabs one of the pieces and ignores the utensils the bar kindly offered her in favor of just eating it in one bite.

[callmeleo]

Leo feels slightly objectified! He crosses his legs primly.

"Jeez, they tried to cut your freaking head off when you manifested? I thought Japan was better about the mutophobic shit. Un...less you're not from Japan, and I'm just- going to stop talking."

[hemomancer]

Xan feels objectified as well! He's cool with that. He spreads his legs slightly and smirks.

"Yeah, shit, rough deal there. I mean, some people tried to hurt me when I came into my own too, but..." He grins. "Didn't last too long."

[stonedtimewitch]

Damara tries to blow out a smoke ring only to find that the bar's provided blunts make that very difficult. "Okay this shit tastes nice but I want my own blunt back," she complains. "I'd go get it but if I show my face in my world then weird knight man comes and try to cut me." She puts the blunt she actually has out against her thumb. "I tell him I no kill anyone else but he no listen. Oh well, fuck that guy. He not pretty anyway."

[hemomancer]

"Ech. We could come with you and help murder him, or something? I'm always game for some legally sanctioned murder."

[callmeleo]

"Or we could offer you asylum at Whateley, because this guy is clearly a big-league super if he's threatening a fucking temporal warper and expects to get away with it. Just a thought? It's a nice place, they teach you how to use your powers to their fullest potential and all that jazz. And you can't smoke or drink in public, but we'll show you the good spots and we can share our weed."

[hemomancer]

"Excuse me!"

[callmeleo]

"Correction: I will share my weed, because Xan is a fucking hoarder. But seriously, it's a nice place and nobody'll murder you there."

[stonedtimewitch]

"Not being dead is nice," Damara says, somewhat suspicious. Recent experiences have made her doubt anything that sounds a little too good to be true but she really wants to no longer be stuck in this bar. "Why those rules though, the fuck are you people from? It sound like boarding school."

[callmeleo]

"It is, in fact, a boarding school. For mutants. It's cool! Everybody's really hot and we have superpowers. It's a sweet gig."

[stonedtimewitch]

Damara is quiet for a bit, she has lots of reservations about schools. Then again if this school is the sort of environment where someone who controls blood isn't out of place, there is very little chance she would have to deal with the same types pf bullies she did in high school. Plus she had learned the appropriate solution for making bullies stop, be a bigger bitch then them and stab them if they did not learn their lesson. She knows she is powerful, the same probably applies even in a super powered school. "Hot people and superpowers? I guess I can try it if there are sweets."

[hemomancer]

"There are definitely sweets. Some sweeter than others."

[callmeleo]

Leo whips his arm lightly with a strand of shadow. "Bad boy. Heel."

[stonedtimewitch]

"[Call me when you start kissing, this bar does not have any yaoi manga and I need my fix.]" She picks up another brownie and devoured it, not caring about the cavities that she was probably creating. "Okay yeah, I want this. They not care about my past right?"

[hemomancer]

"[Well, I wouldn't want to disappoint]," Xan demurs. He catches Leo's mouth and kisses him soundly.

[callmeleo]

Leo has trouble objecting to this! Eventually, however, he breaks away. "Weird Japanese innuendo aside, we have an immigration nightmare to take care of, yeah? Whateley won't care about your past. They'll probably make you a whole new identity."

[stonedtimewitch]

Damara gives the kissing boys an appropriately objectifying stare. "I probably can keep my name since you in other world," she says once the kiss breaks. "Alright good then, I can just pretend my worlds Damara is dead. Now lets give your world a Damara, all worlds should have at least one."

[hemomancer]

Xan pulls out his copy of Leo's credit card. "Hey, hey, wait up. Bar, could you get me a hip flask of whiskey and another of absinthe for Leo?"

Certainly, napkins a napkin. First one's free.

Xan blinks slowly. "In that case, make them really good liquor, okay? And some weed if you've got some, it's been a while since the last care package from Leo's mom."

The requested products appear. Xan slips them into some cunningly hidden pockets designed for exactly this purpose. "Alright, now we can go."

[stonedtimewitch]

Damara stuffs her mouth with pastries and then nods. The logistics of chewing and swallowing a mouth full of sweets occupies her as she follows the two boys out of the bar. She makes sure her knitting needles are still in her pocket, worst comes to worst she will deal with this new school the way she dealt with her old one. She thanks the bar in her own special way before closing the door behind them, a middle finger and a smile.

[andomega]

The bar may be assumed to have taken it in the spirit offered.

Outside the door, there's a stern middle-aged woman in a pantsuit. Her eyes are solid gold, and she looks distinctly irritated.

"Mister Richardson. Mister Santacruz. Miss Megido. What the fuck do you think you're doing and nice to meet you, respectively."

[stonedtimewitch]

"[Nice to meet you too, old lady. Who the fuck are you and why do you know my name?]" Damara says in the sweetest possible tone of voice while picking the rudest possible vocabulary. Damara is a girl of many smiles, for once she does not choose the one that makes her look like she has just kicked a puppy.